Many clients will wonder whether couple counselling can actually help. The answer is, of course it can. We apply research founded principles to support couples to improve their relationships. We draw from science, neuroscience and research to help you develop best-practice interpersonal skills, and we support you to understand the ineffective patterns at play.
But there is one factor that makes all the difference – the therapist can’t do the work for you, you have to be committed to working on your relationship (with their guidance of course).
The one main indicator of client success, is effort. Couples that work hard, seek to improve themselves, reflect on their role, commit to changing their own behaviour – are those most likely to succeed.
Couples that go to relationship counselling to blame each other, want the therapist to pick who is right or wrong, or who have already checked out of the relationship – rarely see results. The couple counselling space isn’t for blaming and shaming, you can have those unconstructive fights at home.
Couple counselling is for collaboration, it is for being willing to come in and look at your role within the relationship. We often say, you can’t change your partner, you can only change yourself. Through changing yourself to be the best person you can be, your partner is likely to do the same – and tada– your relationship is likely to improve.
Couple counselling is incredibly powerful to reflect on your emotional experiences, share them with your partner, develop tools and skills to be better partners going forward. We can give you ALL of the tools and the safe space to explore them, but long-lasting results at the end of the day, are up to you and how much effort you put in.
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